Accidents Happen | Gallery | Transcript |
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[ Chuckie is flying over a jungle sky in a red plane. He is dressed like Indiana Jones. He lands the plane by a river. He climbs out of the plane and barely starts walking when he on confronted by a snarling lion.]
Lion: (roaring)
Chuckie: Get out of my way, Stinky Breath! I’ve got some ‘splorin’ to do. [He walks away from the lion, who stays where he is, looking disappointed.]
[Chuckie paddles along the river in a canoe. He sings along to the background music (which is adventurous sounding and reminiscent of the Indiana Jones soundtrack.)] Da-da-da. Da-da-da-da! (gasps) [He approaches a waterfall, and unsuccessfully tries to paddle back from it. Afraid and shaking, he braces for the plunge… We then see Chuckie lying in bed. He wakes up as dripping liquid is heard. It is revealed that he is lying in a bed with Tommy, who wakes up, and the two of them rock from side to side, feeling the wetness in the bed.]
Tommy: Uh, Chuckie? Did we go swimming’?
Chuckie: Uh, no, Tommy. But I-I think I forgot to go potty in the potty. (nervous laughter) Sorry.
Tommy: That’s okay, Chuckie. But, uh, I thought you was potty-trained.
Chuckie: Uh, I-I thought so, too.
[ Stu is holding Dil. He puts the damp sheets in the washing machine and adds detergent Chas is watching this.]
Dil: (laughing and cooing)
Chas: Sorry about the wet sheets, Didi. [He walks over to Didi, who is sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee.]
Didi: Don’t give it a second thought, Charles. [Stu comes in the kitchen with Dil. He holds Dil out at arm's length.]
Dil: (laughing) [He throws up on Stu.]
Stu: (gasps) Trust me, Chas; sheets are the least of our laundry problems. [He puts Dil in his highchair.] I’m going to go change. Again. [He leaves the kitchen.]
Chas: I’m worried about Chuckie’s little regression. It could be a deep-rooted manifestation of a subconscious resentment for something I did or said.
Didi: Or it could mean Chuckie just made a pee-pee, Charles. Accidents happen. He just had a little… backwards slide.
Chas: Well, if Chuckie’s going backwards, I’m going to face it head on. [Chuckie, Tommy, Phil, and Lil walk into the kitchen, as Chas heads out of the kitchen.]
Stu: Didi? I think I made a slight laundry mistake. All our clothes are pink.
Didi: (sighs) I’ll be right there, Stu. [She heads out of the kitchen.]
Chuckie: Did you hear that, guys? My daddy says I’m going’ backwards!
Tommy: Chuckie, if you were going’ backwards, you would’ve taken your glasses off instead of putted them on! [Chuckie scratches his head, looking unsure.] And went up the stairs instead of down them!
Phil: Unless he means you’re turning’ backwards into a baby.
Lil: Because you went potty in the bed.
Chuckie: (gasps) That must be what he meant!
Lil: Wow! That means soon you’ll be just like… [They look up at Dil in his highchair. He kicks his legs and drools. His cheeks then go flushed, and he closes his eyes and makes a straining movement.]
Dil: Pooooping!
Chuckie: Oh, great! You mean I’m going to be doing that in my pants again? Tellin’ everybody when I do it?
Phil: It’s okay to keep some secrets, Chuckie.
Tommy: I know! We’ll do a ‘experiment. We’ll watch Chuckie take a nap and see if he goes when’s he sleeping’. Chuckie, if you don’t go, it means you’re worrying’ for nothing’. Come on.
Chuckie: But I’m not even tired!
[Chuckie lies in bed, attempting to go to sleep. He opens his eyes, and sees his friends sitting on the bed, staring at him.]
Chuckie: (sighs) Oh.
Lil: Check to see if Chuckie’s wet, Phil.
Phil: I’m not checking him, you check him.
Lil: You, Phillip!
Phil: No, Lillian! [They put their faces up to each other and glare.]
Chuckie: No, it’s no use! I can’t sleep! [He puts his glasses back on.]
Phil: Okay, let’s go play! [He and Lil crawl off the bed.]
Chuckie: (sighs) Oh! [Chas walks into the room, with a diaper bag over his shoulder.]
Chas: There you are, Chuckie! Come with me, little guy. Daddy has a surprise for you. [He picks up Chuckie from the bed and carries him out of the room. Tommy sits on the bed and sadly waves at Chuckie.]
[In the backyard, Spike (1991) chases a butterfly. Tommy, Phil, and Lil are standing with Chuckie.]
Spike (1991): (barking)
Tommy: The surprise is in your shorts?
Chuckie: It’s my new big boy training pants. Wanna see? [Tommy and the twins nod. Chuckie pulls down his shorts, revealing what appears to be Dummi Bears themed training pants.]
Tommy: Um, ooh, what do they do, Chuckie?
Chuckie: Well, they’re for just in case I forget to go potty. [He pulls his shorts up.] But my daddy said they’re definitely different from diapers. [Phil pokes at Chuckie’s shorts. Chuckie walks away, looking unhappy.]
Phil and Lil: Diapies.
Tommy: If Chuckie says they’re not diapies, then they’re not. Uh…even if they sound like ‘em and feel like ‘em.
Chuckie: I guess they’re kind of like diapers.
Phil: Don’t you remember how great diapies is, Chuckie? You can keep stuff in them. [He takes a juice box out from his diaper and drinks it.]
Lil: And the bestest part is wherever you’re playing’, you can stay and go at the same time. [Chuckie sits down, looking sad.]
Tommy: What’s the matter, Chuckie?
Chuckie: Well, it’s just that I liked being potty trained. ‘Cept for the potty-training part. I liked how my daddy, and everybody said how proud they were of me, and how grown up it made me feel. Now, I guess it’s true. I am going’ backwards.
[In the kitchen, Didi puts a bottle of milk into boiling water.]
Chas: Chuckie really likes his new big boy pants, Didi. That’s a cute name for them, don’t you think?
Didi: Well, actually—
Chas: So much better than “corrective underwear.” Now, I think it’s important for Chuckie’s self-esteem that we experience some father-son bonding moments.
Didi: W—
Chas: I’m going to check the paper for some fun stuff to do. [He picks up a newspaper from the counter and walks off.] Nice talking with you, Didi.
Didi: D— Hmm. [Stu walks into the kitchen holding up Dil, wearing a pink onesie.]
Stu: Here’s the Dil-boy! All clean! And pink.
Didi: (sighs)
[In the playpen, Phil, Lil, and Tommy are playing with a block and hammer toy.]
Phil: (grunting)
Phil, Lil, and Tommy: (laughing)
Chuckie: (sighs)
Tommy: Uh, want to play “jungle ‘splorer” like yesterday, Chuckie?
Lil: Yeah! We can ‘splore for more jungle “aminals”. Like “hiccototomooses.”
Phil: And chickens!
Chuckie: That was kind of fun. Especially the part when I called the lion “Stinky Breath”. [He holds his nose and laughs.] And I pushed him out of my way. [Tommy and the twins look at each other.]
Tommy: Uh, Chuckie? You didn’t do that.
Chuckie: Did too! [He runs with his arms spread out.] I was flying’ in the sky and then I met Stinky Breath. [He covers his nose with his hands. He then picks up a block and makes rowing motions with it, like a paddle.] And then gotted into a canoe and the water started getting really loud and then I saw the great big water faucet and…and…then I waked up. [He drops the block.] Wow, I guess I was dreaming’. (chuckles)
Tommy: Gee. Yesterday, we played jungle ‘splorers and airplanes and canoe drivers, right? Maybe that’s why you dreamed about them.
Chuckie: Yeah! Sure, was exciting’! Till I waked up and found out I forgotten to go potty.
Tommy: Hey, Chuckie, maybe you were just having’ such an exciting’ dream, that’s why you forgotten to go potty.
Chuckie: (gasps) You mean every time we play something fun, I’m going to pee in the bed? Oh, brother.
Chas: Guess what, Chuckie? I’m going to take you to some of the most exciting places on Earth!
Chuckie: (gasps and shakes.) [Chas picks Chuckie out of the playpen. Tommy and the twins look at each other, concerned.]
[That night, Chas and Didi sit at the kitchen table with cups of coffee.]
Chas: Chuckie and I really bonded, Didi. Especially the rocket simulator when we both threw up at the same time (chuckles). Gee, I hope he’s not overstimulated.
[Chuckie walks into the playpen and sits down. His friends are wearing pajamas, and Chuckie is wearing a T-shirt that says” “I’ve been to the zoo” and a cap that says” “I ♥ the zoo”. He also has a couple of little “zoo” flags and a plush tiger.]
Tommy, Phil, and Lil: Wow!
Chuckie: I-I saw space men and giant monkeys and-and r-rided on a train!
Chas: Thanks for suggesting he spend the night with his little pals for support. That ought to make him feel nice and secure.
Didi: He’s probably so tired he can’t wait to go to sleep.
[In the playpen, Chuckie looks very tired.]
Chuckie: (yawns)
Lil: (yawns)
Phil: (yawns)
Tommy: If Chuckie goes night-night, he’ll have really great dreams about all the exciting stuff he did, and he might forget to go potty again. So, we gots to keep him up.
[Dil is sleeping in his crib and his mobile is rotating. Tommy and Phil are dragging an extremely sleepy Chuckie.]
Chuckie: (mutters unintelligibly). And the mayor was on the rolly toaster…(sighs) [Chuckie falls asleep.]
Tommy: Uh-oh! Phil! [Phil splashes water from a Mr. Tippy Cup in Chuckie’s face. Chuckie opens his eyes a little bit.]
Chuckie: (gasps) And it was raining. [He goes to sleep again and falls onto the floor.]
Tommy: Oh, no! Quick, guys! [Tommy and the twins tickle Chuckie.]
Chuckie: (laughs) Hey! [He briefly opens his eyes and then falls asleep once more.]
Tommy: I know! Let’s tell him a scary story. [Phil and Lil sleepily nod at each other.]
Phil: There was this monster.
Lil: Ghost, Phillip.
Phil: Monster, Lillian.
Phil and Lil: Who cares? [They both fall backwards, asleep.]
Tommy: Uh, Chuckie? Uh, once upon a time, a big germ taked your glasses.
Chuckie: [opens his eyes and gulps. He flies onto the bed.] Uh! (grunts) [He hides under the covers.] Yah!
Tommy: (yawns) We got to keep him up, guys.
Phil: Who’s going to keep us up? Oh.
Dil: (crying)
[Stu comes running in with a bottle.]
Stu: (panting) Keep your diapers on, Dilly, Daddy’s coming. [He takes Dil from his crib. Tommy and the twins are now in the bed with Chuckie. Everyone except for Chuckie (who stays asleep) sleepily watch as Stu sits with Dil in the rocking chair and feeds him the bottle.] How’s that, kiddo? (singing): Rock-a-Bye, Dilly, Daddy’s here. Maybe I’ll get some sleep… (yawns) next year. Sandman is sprinkling (yawns) dust… [Chuckie and his friends are all asleep.]
[The sun has come up and birds are chirping. Lil wakes up, stretching and rubbing her eyes.]
Lil: (yawns) [Phil wakes up and stretches.]
Phil: (yawns) [Tommy wakes up and rubs his eyes.]
Tommy: (yawns) (gasps) Oh, no, guys! We must have felled asleep!
Phil: So did Chuckie! [Tommy and Lil both look under the covers. Chuckie wakes up and puts his glasses on. He looks at his friends, who are crawling around and investigating the bed.]
Chuckie: (yawns) Hi, guys. Whatcha doing?
Tommy: We was trying to tell if you, uh…you know…
Chuckie: If I what? (gasps) Oh. [He feels under the covers.] (grunting) Hey, everybody…we did it! I’m dry!
[In the kitchen, Stu takes shirts out from the laundry basket and folds them on the kitchen table. Didi gives Chas a cup of coffee.]
Didi: He did just fine, Charles. His little potty was full.
Chas: Oh, thank goodness. I bet our bonding made all the difference. Well, at least you don’t have to worry about the Finsters contributing to your laundry, Stu. [He elbows Stu, and ends up spilling coffee all over the folded shirts.]
Stu: Aah!
Didi: (sighs)
Chuckie: Thanks for helping me, guys!
Tommy: But we didn’t, Chuckie.
Lil: And keeping’ you up didn’t work because we felled asleep.
Tommy: You did it all by yourself, Chuckie.
Chuckie: I must have gotten up and gone in the potty!
Tommy: Yay, Chuckie!
Phil: Yay!
Chuckie: (laughs) I wonder if it was just after the moon man showed me his giraffe.
Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, and Lil: (laugh)
[We see the exterior of the house as the episode ends.]
THE END