The Odd Couple/Transcript

[''The episode begins with a view of Chuckie's Bogo Block villages, which is designed like a Fisher-Price Little People playset. The camera moves across the village, higlighting two figures spinning on a merry-go-round, two people in the barber shop, a mechanic in the garage, an airplane at the airport, and a fire engine in the fire station. Lil picks up a figure of a girl near the fire station and places her outside the Police Station.'']


 * Lil: "She's gonna go to the police station cause' her Mommy was stolen!"

[Phil picks up the figure and places her at the fire station.]


 * Phil: "No, Lil, she's going to the fire station cause her puppy's up a tree!"

[Lil picks up the figure.]


 * Lil: "Police station, Phil!"

[Phil grabs the figure, which he and Lil fight over.]


 * Phil: "Fire station, Lil!"


 * Lil: "Police!"


 * Phil: "Fire!"


 * Lil: "Police!"


 * Phil: "Fire!"


 * Chuckie: "STOP!" [Phil and Lil drop the figure. Chuckie is standing in the doorway to his bedroom.] "What in Bob's name do you think you're doing?!"

[Phil is now holding a figure of a man in a blue hat and overalls.]


 * Phil: "We were just playing with your Bogo Blocks."


 * Lil: "We weren't gonna take em' or anything!"

[As Chuckie talks to Phil and Lil, he walks into his bedroom.]


 * Chuckie: "I know, I know, it's just that... uh, well, I worked really hard to get em' ezactly right, and I'd rather not mess em' up."

[''Chuckie picks up the figure that Phil and Lil fought over and puts her on the swing. He then pushes the swing, causing the figure to swing on it.'']


 * Phil:"Fine, Chuckie."


 * Lil: "Yeah, have it your way."

[The next scene takes place in the kitchen, where Chas is at the table, with a phone in one hand, and a pencil in the other.]


 * Chas: "Yes, I'd like the answer to one across."

[A voice can be heard unintelligibly over the phone, and Chas writes on the newspaper in front of him.]


 * Chas: "Thank you. Wait, could you also tell me two across?

[The crossword descriptions are as follows:

Across 1. Entrance 2. Not Over 3. Cow Sound 5. For Example 6. Not Low

Down 1. Stupid 4. Not Left 5. Hame' ___ 6. Not Cud 7. Canine

As the voice on the phone talks unintelligibly to Chas, Chas writes down UNDER in two across.]


 * Chas: "And three across?" [The voice on the phone talks unintelligibly to chas, who writes down MOO in three across.] "Okay. Uh, could you hold on a second? I have another call." [Chas presses a button on the phone.] "Hello? Oh, hi, Stu." [Stu talks unintelligibly to Chas over the phone.] "The holiday weekend, huh?" [As Stu continues talking unintelligibly to Chas over the phone, Chas picks up a glass. He gets out of his chair and walks towards the ice dispenser of his fridge.] "Yes, sounds nice. Oh, no, you know Tommy's always welcome here. Yeah, bring him over." [As Chas continues talking to Stu, he walks back to the table.] "Listen, Stu, I gotta go. I'm paying two dollars a minute on the other line." [As Stu talks unintelligibly to Chas over the phone, Chas sits down and sets his glass of water down.] "No, Stu, it's the Crossword Puzzle help line!" [Stu continues talking unintelligibly over the phone.] "I'll see you later." [Chas presses a button on the phone, going back to the Crossword Puzzle help line. He picks up his pencil.] Yes, could you give me the Answer to Number One Down?"

[The Across answers are listed as follows: DOOR UNDER MOO

The description to 1 Down is "Stupid", and since there are four letters in 1 Down, the answer is DUMB. The screen transitions to the next scene, where Chas is at the front door. He opens it, and Didi, who is carrying Tommy and his diaper bag, is on the other side.]


 * Chas: "Oh, hi, Didi."


 * Didi: "Hi, Charles! Thanks for looking after Tommy." [As Didi continues talking to Chas, she walks into his house.] "Stu and I have been looking forward to this cheese-tasting tour for months!"

[Chas closes the door.]


 * Chas: "Oh, no problem."

[''Chas turns around and follows Didi. Didi walks into Chuckie's bedroom, where Chuckie, Phil, and Lil are all playing with Chuckie's Bogo Block village. Didi sets Tommy down in front of them.'']


 * Didi: "Bye-bye, sweetie. Mommy will be back after the long weekend!"

[''Tommy gasps excitedly when he finds out he is spending the whole weekend at Chuckie's house. Didi kisses Tommy on his forehead, then reaches into Tommy's diaper bag and pulls out a piece of paper.'']


 * Didi: "Now, Charles, I've got a few phone numbers here."

[As Didi continues talking to Chas, they exit Chuckie's bedroom.]


 * Didi: "Tonight, we'll be at Olga's Cheese in Wakasha. Then tomorrow, we'll be leaving Wakasha from the cross, where we'll..."


 * Tommy: "Hey, guys, dya hear? I'm staying over for a long weekend!"


 * Chuckie: "Wow! How long is that?"

[Tommy stands up and walks up to Chuickie.]


 * Tommy: "Well, I don't know exactly, but it's the longest I've ever been away from home!"


 * Chuckie: "This'll be so much fun!"

[Phil and Lil, who are playing with a red ball with stars, look at each other upon hearing this.]


 * Phil and Lil: "Uh-oh!"

[Chuckie stands up.]


 * Tommy and Chuckie: "What?"


 * Phil: "You want to tell them, Lil?"

[Phil rolls the ball to Lil.]


 * Lil: "Maybe you better."

[Lil rolls the ball back to Phil, who sighs as he stands up.]


 * Phil: "All right. See, if you guys live together, you're gonna start fightin' all the time."

[Phil throws the ball to Lil.]


 * Tommy: "Come on, guys! Me and Chuckie are bestest friends!"

[Tommy and Chuckie put their hands behind each other's backs.]


 * Phil: "Sure, now!"

[Lil stands up.]


 * Lil: "But soon, you'll start to bug each other!"


 * Phil: "First it's just little things, like forgetting to share a toy.


 * Lil: "But it'll get worse! Everything they do'll bug ya!"

[Tommy and Chuckie look at each other, then back at Phil and Lil.]


 * Phil: "The way they drink their milk..."

[As Lil talks to Tommy and Chuckie, she tosses the ball onto the floor, and it bounces away.]


 * Lil: "The way they roll a ball!"

[Phil walks up to Tommy and Chuckie, and points at Lil.]


 * Phil: "The way she wears a ribbon in her hair!"

[Lil walks up to Phil and points at the duck on his shirt.]


 * Lil: "The way he has a stupid, ugly duck on his shirt!

[Phil points at Lil's untied shoes.]


 * Phil: "The way her shoes are never tied!"


 * Lil: "The way his diaper smells like poop!"


 * Phil: "The way..."


 * Tommy: "Guys! Guys!"

[Phil and Lil turn their attention to Tommy.]


 * Tommy: "Where do you get these crazy ideas?"


 * Chuckie: "Yeah-hah! You two guys live together without any problems!"

[''Phil and Lil sigh in disagreement. The screen transitions to the next scene, which takes place that night. Tommy and Chuckie are in their pajamas, and playing with red, blue, and green wooden blocks. As they talk to each other, they build a tower from them.'']


 * Tommy: "Boy, Chuckie, your dad sure is a great cook! We never have carrot puree at home!"


 * Chuckie: "Wait till' you try his mashed peas!"


 * Tommy: "You know, Chuckie, Phil and Lil don't know what they're talking about. We're gonna get along great!"


 * Chuckie: "Of course we are!"


 * Tommy: "Hey! Let's go play with Mr. Banana Head!"

[Tommy crawls towards Chuckie's Mr. Banana Head.]


 * Chuckie: "Um, Tommy?"


 * Tommy: "Yeah?"


 * Chuckie: "Hold on a sec!"

[Just as Tommy is about to grab Chuckie's Mr. Banana head, he turns to face Chuckie.]


 * Tommy: "Something wrong, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "Well, uh, yeah. You forgot to clean up the blocks!"


 * Tommy: "Clean up the blocks? Uh, I don't understand!"


 * Chuckie: "Well, when you're done playing with a toy, you put it away!"

[Chuckie picks a block up from the top of the tower, knocking the rest over.]


 * Tommy: "Chuckie, we're babies! We have parents to do that kind of stuff for us!"

[Tommy crawls back to Chuckie and the blocks.]


 * Chuckie: "No, Tommy! We gotta put the blocks away!"

[''Chuckie picks up a box that says, BLOX IN A BOX. He then stands up.'']


 * Chuckie: "A clean room is a happy room! See?"


 * Tommy: "Like this?"

[''Tommy picks up a green block and tosses it into the box. Chuckie lowers his glasses in disapproval.'']


 * Chuckie: "Uh, well, actually, you gotta put em' away by color and size."

[Chuckie picks up a green block, then puts it down.]


 * Chuckie: "The blue ones go here, the red ones are next, then green. And, you always go from big to small! Big to small!"


 * Tommy: "Big to small?"


 * Chuckie: "Yep! Big to small."


 * Tommy: "Gosh, in my house, we never spend all this time putting blocks away!"

[''Tommy puts the blocks into the box. The screen transitions to the next scene, where the box is now filled with the blocks. The camera moves over to Chas, who tucks Tommy and Chuckie into Chuckie's bed.'']


 * Chas: "Night, Chuckie!"

[Chas kisses Chuckie on his forehead.]


 * Chas: "Night, Tommy."

[''Chas kisses Tommy on his forehead. He walks towards the door and turns off the light. Chuckie rubs his eyes.'']


 * Chuckie: "Boy, I'm tired! Night, Tommy!"


 * Tommy: "Hey, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "Yeah?"


 * Tommy: "I'm really glad we're friends."


 * Chuckie: "Me too, Tommy."

[Chuckie tries to go back to sleep, but Tommy wants to talk to him some more.]


 * Tommy: "Hey, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "Yeah?"


 * Tommy: "I'm really glad I'm staying over at your house."


 * Chuckie: "Uh, me too, Tommy."

[Chuckie pulls the covers over his ear.]


 * Tommy: Even if you do waste a lot of time putting away your blocks. Hey, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "What?! Tommy, What? I'm trying to sleep!"


 * Tommy: "Oh, nothing, really. Uh, I was just thinking about green Jell-o."


 * Chuckie: "Green Jell-o?"


 * Tommy: "Yeah? How do they do it?"


 * Chuckie: "Do what?!"


 * Tommy: "Make it green!"


 * Chuckie: "I don't know, Tommy! Just go to sleep!"

[''Chuckie lies down to try to go back to sleep, and Tommy yawns. As Tommy lies down, Chuckie's eyes open upon hearing Tommy's question.'']


 * Chuckie: "How do they make it green?"

[''The next scene takes place in the kitchen. A close-up of a bowl of Dummi Bear Sugar Lumps cereal floating in milk is seen. Chuckie scoops up a spoonful of cereal and puts it in his mouth.'']


 * Tommy: "Hey, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "Huh?"

[Tommy is seen staring at his bowl of cereal, next to its box.]


 * Tommy: "What is this stuff?"

[The camera moves over to Chuckie.]


 * Chuckie (with his mouth full): "It's Dummi Bear Sugar Lumps! Don't you like em'?"


 * Tommy: "At my house, we have Reptar cereal!"

[As Chuckie talks to Tommy, he reaches into the box.]


 * Chuckie: "Well, sorry, Tommy, but this is what my dad buys! Plus, look!"

[Chuckie pulls a Dummi Bear whistle out of the box.]


 * Chuckie: "You get a free Dummi Bear whistle inside!"

[As Tommy talks to Chuckie, he splashes the milk in his bowl.]


 * Tommy: "You get a free dinosaur in Reptar cereal!"

[''Chuckie blows the whistle, causing a piece of cereal to fly out it. Tommy wipes his hands on his pajamas.'']


 * Tommy: "Uh, it's no big deal, Chuckie. I like staying at your house, even if you do have yucky cereal."

[''Tommy flicks a piece of cereal from his bowl. The scene rtransitions to the next scene, which takes place in the living room. Tommy and Chuckie are now dressed in their normal attire, and Tommy sits on the couch with a bored expression on his face as Chuckie watches his favorite show, Space Trek Babies, which is essentially a combination of Star Trek and the spin-off babies trend popularized by Muppet Babies.'']


 * Baby Spock: "We can't abort the entire mission for one lost teddy bear, captain! It's just not logical!"

[Baby McCoy is seen bouncing in a jumper.]


 * Baby McCoy: "You and your infernal logic! Can't you see? We're babies, not computers!"

[''Tommy changes the channel to Reptar, who is destroying the city. The camera moves over to Chuckie, who is shocked to find out Tommy changed the channel.'']


 * Chuckie: "What are you doing? Space Trek Babies is my favorite show!"

[Tommy, who is holding the remote, walks up to Chuckie.]


 * Tommy: "Oh, I was just changin' the channel! In my house, we always watch Reptar."

[''Tommy sits down and watches Reptar. He then looks at Chuckie in concern.'']


 * Tommy: "Hey, is something wrong, Chuckie?"

[Chuckie waves his arms in denial.]


 * Chuckie: "Oh, no! Nothing at all!"

[''Chuckie crouches into a fetal position, with an angry look on his face as Tommy continues watching. The next scene takes place at night. In Chuckie's bedroom, Chuckie is having a hard time falling asleep, and is shivering due to Tommy having wrapped himself in his blanket. Tommy yawns, and Chuckie grunts as he pulls on his blanket. As soon as he gets some over him, Tommy yawns and pulls the blanket away. Chuckie gasps, then decides something must be done. He walks up to his cymbals on the table at the end of his bed and picks them up. He bangs them, waking up Tommy.'']


 * Tommy: "Aaaah! Oh, what? Oh!"

[''The camera zooms out on Tommy, revealing Chuckie to be wrapped in his blanket. Tommy pulls the blanket away from Chuckie, who now starts shivering. The screen transitions to the next scene, which takes place the next morning. Stamps of Pelvis, an Elvis lookalike, are being licked by Lil. Tommy giggles as he and Lil paste them onto Phil, who is covered in them. Chuckie, who is sitting in front of a giant teddy bear, yawns, as he didn't get a good night's sleep thanks to Tommy hogging his blanket.'']


 * Tommy: "You see, Phil? When we're done, We'll just put you in the mailbox, and the mailman will take you to China!"


 * Phil: "Neat!"

[The camera moves over to Lil.]


 * Lil: "So, how's everything going with you guys?"


 * Phil: "Yeah, are you driving each other crazy yet?"


 * Tommy: "Ha! Don't be silly, Phil! We're getting along great! We've been playing with blocks, and watching Reptar, and having lots of fun, right, Chuckie?"

[Tommy walks up to Chuckie, who is asleep, and nudges him with his elbow, waking him up with a start.]


 * Chuckie: "What? Oh, yeah! Lots of fun!"

[Phil and Lil look at each other in disapproval.]


 * Tommy: "Hey, I'm gonna get some more stamps. I'll be right back!"

[''Tommy runs out the doorway to Chuckie's bedroom. Chuckie looks back, and as soon as Tommy is out of the room, he runs up to Phil and Lil.'']


 * Chuckie: "Guys, I can't take it anymore! Everything we do, he complains! 'In my house, we do it this way!', 'In my house, we do it that way!'! What am I gonna do?"


 * Phil: "I hate to say it, but..."

[Lil walks up to Phil.]


 * Phil and Lil: "We told you so!"

[''The next scene takes place in Chuckie's bedroom. Chuckie's Bogo Block Village is a mess, and Tommy picks up the fire engine.'']


 * Chuckie: "No, Tommy, no!"


 * Tommy: "What's wrong, Chuckie?"

[Chuckie runs into his bedroom and up to Tommy and the Bogo Block Village.]


 * Chuckie: "What's wrong? What's wrong? Look what you did, it's all ruined!"


 * Tommy: "What's all ruined, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "The Bogo Block Village!"

[Chuckie pulls the police car out of the fire station.]


 * Chuckie: "The police car is in the fire station,"

[Chuckie picks up the fire engine.]


 * Chuckie: "The fire truck's at the airport, the airplane's on top of the restaurant, people are hanging out of windows, buildings are moved, and you've completely taken apart city hall!"

[Chuckie picks up a building and shakes it, causing several figures to fly out of it.]


 * Tommy: "Chuckie, in my house, we do stuff like this all the time!"

[''As Chuckie talks to Tommy, he stands up. He then points to Tommy'']


 * Chuckie: "'My house!', 'My house!', 'My house!'! Let me tell you something, Tommy! This isn't 'my' house, it's my house! And when you're in my house, sometimes you gotta do things my way!"

[''Chuckie picks up two buildings and shakes them, causing several figures to fly out of them. He then tosses them on the floor.'']


 * Tommy: "Wow, Chuckie. I'm really sorry."

[Chuckie sniffles, then sits down.]


 * Chuckie: "It's okay, Tommy. You didn't know. Here."

[Chuckie picks up a building.]


 * Chuckie: "Let me show you where everything goes. Now, the airplane goes in the airport, okay?"

[Chuckie picks up the airplane and places it near the airport.]


 * Tommy: "Well, I guess that makes sense."

[Chuckie then pushes the police car into the police station.]


 * Chuckie: "And the police car goes in the police station, and the fire truck..."

[Chuckie picks up the fire engine, and Tommy points to the fire station.]


 * Tommy: "Goes in the fire station!"


 * Chuckie: "Great!"

[''Chuckie hands Tommy the fire engine, and Tommy puts it in the fire engine. Chuckie walks towards the teddy bears.'']


 * Chuckie: "Now, let me show you where the teddy bears go!"

[''Tommy looks at the camera with a frown on his face. The screen transitions to the next scene, where Tommy straightens a crooked picture of a Dummi Bear that says, I ♥ YOU THIS MUCH. Tommy walks away, and Chuckie makes sure the picture is 100% straight. The next scene shows a scene from Space Trek Babies, where Baby Kirk, Baby Spock, and Baby McCoy are teleported through beams. Chuckie stares in awe, while Tommy gives a bored stare. The next scene shows Chas spoon-feeding Tommy some Dummi Bear Sugar Lumps, which Tommy reluctantly swallows. The screen transitions to the next scene, where Phil and Lil are playing with a two-circle puzzle in Chuckie's bedroom. They look up at Chuckie.'']


 * Phil: "So, how bad is it, Chuckie?"


 * Lil: "Is he still driving you nuts?"

[As Chuckie talks to Phil and Lil, he places the smallest teddy bear in front of the others.]


 * Chuckie: "Actually, guys, me and Tommy had a little talk, and now everything's going fine!"

[Phil and Lil look at each other, then Tommy, who is holding a ring of keys, runs into Chuckie's bedroom.]


 * Tommy: "Well, I got the keys!"

[Chuckie stands up and turns to face Tommy.]


 * Tommy: "Okay, Chuckie, your turn to go hide em'!"

[Chuckie takes the keys from Tommy.]


 * Chuckie: "I'll be back in a sec!"

[''As Chuckie runs out the doorway, Tommy watches him. As soon as Chuckie is out of the room, Phil kicks the puzzle aside. Tommy runs up to him and Lil.'']


 * Tommy: "Phil, Lil, you were right! I can't take it anymore!"

[Tommy pulls on Phil and Lil's shirts.]


 * Tommy: "Every time I play with a toy, you gotta put it away just right! The puzzle has to go like this, the teddy bear has to go like that, and If I have to watch Space Trek Babies one more time, I'm gonna quack!"


 * Phil and Lil: "We told you so!

[''The screen transitions to the next scene, where Tommy puts the wooden blocks in the box the way Chuckie taught him, or so he thinks. He tries to walk away, but Chuckie walks up to him.'']


 * Chuckie: "Uh, Tommy?"

[Tommy turns to face Chuckie.]


 * Tommy: "Yeah?"

[Chuckie points at Tommy.]


 * Chuckie: "Do you remember what I told you about the blocks?"


 * Tommy: "Yeah, Chuckie, I put em' away by size and color. 'Big to small, big to small'."

[Chuckie is now holding two blocks.]


 * Chuckie: "You forgot shape."


 * Tommy: "Shape?!"

[''Chuckie picks up a green triangular block. As he show Tommy how to put the blocks away, Tommy stares angrily at him, indicating that Chuckie didn't teach him about shape, especially since the viewers didn't get to see whether or not it really happened.'']


 * Chuckie: You see, this block is a fryangle, it should be put in with the fryangles."

[Chuckie then picks up a green square block.]


 * Chuckie: "And this block is a square, so it should go with the other squares."

[Chuckie then picks up a red overhead arch block.]


 * Chuckie: "And this block is a... well, it's a funny-looking shape, and it should go with the other funny-looking shapes!"

[''Chuckie places the red arch block where it belongs. Tommy continues staring angrily at Chuckie.'']


 * Chuckie: "Let me explain it again."

[Chuckie picks up a green trianglular block.]


 * Chuckie: "You see, this block is a fryangle."

[''Tommy, who's had enough of Chuckie's rules, kicks the block tower, causing blocks to fly everywhere. He then crosses his arms and looks away from Chuckie.'']


 * Chuckie: "You're just gonna leave em' like that, aren't you?"

[Chuckie stands up and picks up some of the blocks.]


 * Chuckie: "The red blocks are all mixed with the blue ones, and the squares are with the fryangles, and you don't even care! You really don't care!"

[''Chuckie cries. Tommy looks over at Chuckie, and realizing he had not exactly been a good houseguest nor a good friend to Chuckie, Tommy cries as well. The screen transitions to Tommy and Chuckie in bed that night. Tommy has most of Chuckie's blanket.'']


 * Tommy: "Hey, Chuckie?"


 * Chuckie: "What?"


 * Tommy: "I'm sorry I got mad at you, and I'm sorry I messed up your blocks."


 * Chuckie: "Really?"


 * Tommy: "Uh-huh. It's just that, well, I miss my Mommy and Daddy, and I miss my house, and I miss doing everything my way."


 * Chuckie: "Well, I'm sorry I got mad at you, too."

[Chuckie turns to face Tommy.]


 * Chuckie: "I guess, sometimes everyone just needs to be in their own house and do things their own way."


 * Tommy: "Hey, Chuckie, aren't you cold? Here, take some more blanket!"

[Tommy hands Chuckie his blanket.]


 * Chuckie: "Thanks!"

[''No sooner do Tommy and Chuckie fall asleep, when the door to Chuckie's bedroom opens. Stu, Didi, and Chas walk in.'']


 * Chas (whispering): "He was no trouble at all."

[''Didi walks up to Tommy and picks him up. Stu appears to either be eating a piece of cheese he has in his hand and his mouth is full, or to have had an allergic reaction to it and has his cheeks swollen.'']


 * Didi (whispering): "Hello, Tommy. We missed you!"

[''As Stu and Didi walk away with Tommy, Tommy looks down at Chuckie. Stu and Didi walk up to Chas.'']


 * Chas (whispering): "Oh, by the way, thanks for the limburger loaf!"

[''As Stu and Didi walk out the door, Tommy waves good-bye to Chuckie. Despite the trouble they had together, he had a good weekend at Chuckie's house. Chuckie waves back, indicating, despite the trouble they had together, he was glad to have Tommy stay at his house. Chas closes the door, then the next scene takes place at Tommy's house. Stu and Didi park their car outside the garage, and in Tommy's messy bedroom, Didi turns the light on and walks up to Tommy's crib.'']


 * Didi: "Night-night, sweetie."

[''Didi kisses Tommy on his forehead, then sets him down in his crib. She walks away, and switches the light off. Tommy looks around his messy bedroom, then walks up to his set of wooden blocks. The screen then transitions to Tommy having finished the block tower, organizing it the way Chuckie taught him. He walks back up to his crib and climbs back into it. The camera zooms out, revealing the rest of his room to still be messy. The screen fades to black, ending the episode.'']